I had to do this. And I had to get this done. Redundant, perhaps ... but I couldn't just let this sit stagnant, fermenting in my mind forever! I knocked on the door.

"What? Come in."

I opened the door. She was studying at the desk. I picked my way over the stuff on the floor and sat on the edge of the bed, facing her. "Hi, Paige ... it's me."

She turned. She was taken off guard: ~startled~ "What do you want?" she asked crisply and I knew she was plotting my death again. I had to face her, though -- if I must die, so be it.

"I just wanted to talk. About ... well, what's going on."

"Yes?" she asked, not looking up, calm, cool, trying to be emotionless but ~angry~ and she hated my guts and -- was that ~fear~?

"Well, I -- I know you hate me."

She laughed.

"No, really -- I'm tying to be serious, here. I know you hate me. I don't even need to be empathic to figure it out. You won't talk to me, when you do it's coldly civil -- it's like when I talk to Em -- Ms. Frost. I think."

"Jen, Ah -- I don't hate you." She was being awfully condescending, like her words were directed at a child that simply didn't understand what she was saying the first time.

"Yes, you do," I insisted. "Now, I didn't come here to try and be friends and try to make everything all better 'cause I know it doesn't work that way. But I want to ease this -- so we can at least talk to one another instead of this cold resentment."

"But I don't hate you." She exuded a soft ~exasperation~ as she informed me of this yet again.

Her words snapped me from my speech. "But -- but why the frustration? The anger?" It didn't add up.

"Hate -- hate is a strong word," Paige explained. "I don't hate you."

But I dislike you strongly, I was sure she'd add. She didn't but it had to be what she was thinking. It had to be. "But you dislike me strongly," I finished for her.

"I wouldn't say that, either." She put down her pen, took off her glasses and looked right at me. "I don't -- I don't understand you," she admitted. "There are things you do -- I don't get you half the time. You oughta be gettin' straight A's in every class. Why don't you study more?"

"I hate class," I explained. That wasn't entirely true. English was alright, and I loved history -- at least back home I'd loved history.

"If you just tried a little harder --"

"I'd be just like you," I interrupted.

~??!!~ "What the heck do ya mean by that?"

Her voice was bordering on Southern now. Keep it calm -- don't say anything to upset her more --

"I just --" I began, "I meant -- nothing."

She didn't believe me.

"I mean, I'm not you and I don't want to be." Oh, but didn't I want to be? After all, Jono liked her. And she was the one getting all the grades. She was the smart one. "No," I contradicted, though, "that's not what I mean."

~confusion~ "Then what do you mean?"

"Okay ... well, the ... grades, well, I couldn't -- well, even if I watned to I couldn't ... because I'm -- and you're just ..." Better. She was just better. And everyone liked her, Sunshine Paige, so honest and straightforward and intelligent and --

"Jen, this is it. I'm not gettin' you, here."

/Maybe because I'm not talking in complete sentences./ "Why do you hate me?" I blurted.

"I told you," Paige reiterated, "I don't hate you. I don't understand you."

"Well, why don't you understand me?" I countered.

"If I knew that I think I'd understand you."

Ah! Such logic! But of course she didn't understand me. "It's because of Jono, isn't it?"

~curious~defensive~ "No, it's not." Crisp, and she started turning back to her work again, dismissing me.

I didn't leave. "I know what you're feeling. It's because of Jono."

"Don't assume things," she instructed in a tone that could have been borrowed from Emma.

"I'm not," I explained. "I'm telling you what I know. I sense emotions, you do recall -- and it's because of Jono."

"That doesn't even make sense."

I almost laughed. She was afraid of me finding out -- of me finding things out about her that I might tell everyone else. She had her own secrets locked behind that sunny exterior -- not as deep as Monet's, to be sure, but secrets nonetheless.

"You're jealous." I realized it as soon as I'd said it -- she was jealous. Of me! When she was Sunshine! I shook my head. "You're ... you're jealous. That ... that's almost ridiculous."

"Because it isn't true!" she exploded. "Jen -- I'm not jealous!"

That laugh I'd been holding in escaped. Why was I laughing? Was this really funny? "No ... no, of course not. That's me, you see. That's me, Sunshine ..." I couldn't help it. I was laughing and I just couldn't help it. Soft unmade sheets hit the side of my face as I fell over laughing so hard. I was starting to get a headache -- had to breathe.

"Are you okay?" Paige's genuinely concerned voice shone like a ray of light through the dense fog, so murky and grey, inside my head.

The fog clouded my vision and the sight I'd known blurred. I had to breathe -- couldn't talk if I couldn't breathe -- hah! "Okay?" I questioned as though I were asking someone else instead of simply echoing her word to make sure I'd heard correctly. "Yes, yes -- I'm more than okay. I'm insane." I sat up, breathing as best I could through this dense mist clogging every part of my head and every way out. "Yes, I'm insane and it's fun! Insane ... hah, yes!" I looked right at her, in those beautiful blue eyes that sparkled in the light, at that soft complexion that could be ripped off at a moment's notice. I reached out to her, placing each of my hands on one of her shoulders, gripping so she might not leave before I was done with her. "I'm insane," I spoke in a stage whisper. "I shouldn't be here -- I should be somewhere else." I laughed some maniacal villainous laugh. "And I'm in love with your boyfriend! How's that? How is it, Sunshine? How's that feel?"

"He's not mah boyfriend!" she exclaimed, trying to pull away from me, turning and writhing underneath my hard grip.

"I suppose next you'll tell me you can't stand him, hmm? Hah!" The short explosion of words left my lips and the whisper left, my voice building and building ... "Hah! I've felt it! Your remorse -- your pain, your passion! That's why you hate me! Because I'm so bloody in love with him! He he! Otherwise we could be great friends, whaddayasay?" I felt her twisting underneath my hands, trying to wriggle out of my grasp. She left handfuls of torn skin in my fists as she got away from me. Oh, not yet ... not yet, I wasn't done with her yet! "Ooh," I marvelled sarcastically. "Such a neat trick ... but do you know what? I'm not done with you. And he doesn't treat me any better! Oh, no! Not one bit! So, Sunshine, no reason to hate me --" I advanced on her, waving fistfuls of flesh in her face. "He can't stand me either! But just between you and me, I think he can't stand me more. So you might actually stand a chance." I dropped the flesh on the ground beneath her. I didn't see her anymore, the fog was too thick, I had to get through this layer of madwoman that had grown on me. "If," the madwoman held one of my fingers in the air and I was powerless -- "If ye can ever get through ter him. And it ain't easy. Not that I 'ave or anything -- but it ain't easy."

"Jennifer?" she asked. I'd trapped her in a corner by now. Saying my name wasn't going to help anything.

But the madwoman in control didn't recognise my name -- it wasn't hers at all, it was me, it was who I was. Some grip she yet held on me -- no, not she -- he. A madman. One we both loved. " 'e's got an 'old on me ... " I muttered. I didn't know what was going on, my hands against my head as though it might drown out whatever it was in that back corner of -- no, not just that back corner anymore, but pervading my whole brain and I was unable to let go....

"Get out. Please...."

I couldn't hear her through the fog. It was only growing stronger, with ~fear~ and ~concern~ and ~confusion~ and a myriad of other emotions all mixing within me. I wanted to look at her but everything was blurry and hot and wet -- her face was wet. I remembered when my face was wet. I didn't like it. It wasn't fun. "I can't do that," I explained. "Because if I leave you now --"

"Please."

"Yer ... you're crying," I observed, the word for the wet face coming into my vocabulary again. I'd known that word once ... "Don't cry."

She sunk onto the floor and buried her head in her hands, sobbing. She was so scared ...

"You're gonna make me cry, too ..." I said as I knelt beside her on the floor. I only wanted to help her. I didn't mean to scare her. That wasn't --

"What are ya doin'?" ~frustration~ more ~confusion~

"I don't know. I donno." No need to say it twice but maybe twice for the two of us. I always knew he was there but he was never actually in my head. What was he doing in my head? I wanted to run away but couldn't -- I couldn't leave Paige there like that; she was a wreck and so was I and I wanted to know what was going on and I think I could see myself through the fog ... My face was wet, now, too, wet just like Paige's and wet just like before ... I wanted to curl up and die. To die would be to leave. To leave would be an exit. An exit would be an off-ramp. An off-ramp would be a tollbooth. Did I have exact change? I used quarters to pay for an action figure once ...

"Jen? Do you need help? I can go get Ms. Frost...."

Frost gathered on the windowpanes signaling the start of winter. Winter meant snow and I hated snow and cold and school. I never did well on tests. But that was why I was here, right, so I could learn more about the tests and trials of every day life. Life was full of pictures, like that magazine. I once had a subscription to TV Guide but that was soon cancelled like my favorite show seaQuest. They got rid of half the characters and brought in this really cheesy writer. Sometimes writers could be bad, like Larry Hama. Who was Larry Hama, anyway?

I didn't like ham ...

"Jen, do you want me to go get Ms. Frost?"

Ray of light, and I feel like I've just come home zephyr in the sky at night ... no. Frost. Ms. Frost. Emma Frost, the White Queen. Telepath. Yes. Help. Help me get out of this. My head hurt. She could fix that. Head doctor in that bright white lab coat -- I felt my head move up and down slowly.

I let the Sunshine leave and I was trapped in the darkness behind my eyes soup swirling in my brain, no, Soup sticks to walls. Peter the photographer. An increasing pain welled up inside me and I thought I might --

/This hurts. You're hurting me./ Who was I talking to? Was I talking? No, I wasn't. I hurt too much to talk. Couldn't talk or breathe or eat or -- no, that wasn't me.

Funny feelings flooded into my head and made that grey soup even thicker, like pea soup, I hated peas ... peas did not go with carrots. He talked right into my head. He was always in my head. Did I put him there? *Sorry, luv.*

Luv -- love? I thought he loved that other girl. /What are you doing?/

~confusion~ More confusion to be added to the mix? Didn't anyone ever feel anything else? I had had enough of confusion and angst ... *I wasn't doing anything.*

/But --/ But that didn't go, non sequitur, which was a pretty decent Voyager episode about Harry Kim who went to Marseilles to see Paris ...

*I don't know what to tell yer, gel.*

I shook my head, I felt it shaking and moving ever so slightly and wilder and wilder and Dionne Wilder ... /I was talking to ... to Sun -- to Paige and I just went nuts only I think I still am; it was like I was watching --/ Had to take a deep breath, breathe and get that oxygen to my brain. It had to work that way -- it worked that way with me. I had to breathe yet. Death was not an option. Or was that failure? Either way, both -- just keep in contact. Wasn't it that contact that had been hurting me in the first place?

I had to keep talking. He was there. Maybe not actually physically there, but he was listening. For once someone was listening. I had to gain control. Tell him what happened. /I was talking to Paige and I just flipped. It was like I was watching myself from the inside. Like I wasn't me. I think I -- Light, I think I told her everything./

~?~

Not more emotions, they made my head hurt more.

/No, not everything ... I don't think I don't remember./

*Yer ... don't remember?*

/Paige went to get Ms. Frost,/ I realized.

*Do ... do yer want me to come ...?*

Of course I did. I always wanted him closer ... I tried to shove that out before -- before he came running, though. Not that he actually would come running. But if he came any closer it might only do more damage. /Stay where you are,/ I instructed. /I don't want to hurt./ The headache that came was likely a result of everything.... or something.

*I -- I don't want ter hurt yer, either.*

I wanted to check for motion, to see if Jono was staying where he was or coming. Using my powers just might hurt more, though. But I couldn't just turn it off, it was always there, that constant awareness of others, of Jono in particular. His emotions just flooded to me the moment he felt them and it seemed I felt them, too. I still didn't know what I'd done. Knowing he was there was a comfort, though. I couldn't move.

I wondered if Paige had found Emma yet.

He probably knew every single thing that had happened here because he was inside my head. Was he the madman hitching a ride on my brain?

/Jono?/

*Wot?*

/Talk to me./ I didn't know where that odd request came from, but it was me talking -- thinking -- there was no need to worry about said madman riding the boxcar on my train of thought. Perhaps it was because when I'd thought to him, and he'd spoken to me from so far away, he'd alleviated some of the insanity plaguing my consciousness or the complete lack thereof.

~??~

/Please -- I don't want to fade out again./ I knew it meant I'd be even more aware of the constant psionic contact, so much more aware of the elephant I wasn't supposed to think about. And it would probably hurt, even if only a little, all these new and old emotions coming from him to mingle with the others whirling about inside my brain and pressing against the walls of my skull. I didn't care. I needed him to be there. So I didn't go insane.

*About wot?*

/I don't care. Anything. Keep me awake. Just until Emma gets here./

*Are yer sure you don't want me there?*

I considered this. Would his being closer actually hurt so much as -- as whatever it was? /Try,/ I suggested. /If it hurts I'll let you know./ Odd, because I was sure that if I hurt, he'd feel my pain -- had he been feeling it all along?

Jono started coming. I could feel him getting closer. He didn't even have to ask where I was. That in itself was positively freaky. I stayed curled up, there, though, hot and tired and wet from crying and with the worst headache I'd ever had.

And then he was there. I didn't even hear the door open. I just knew.

*I'm 'ere.*

/I know./ That was it, that was it -- just "I know". Simple, not speaking because I couldn't talk and even if I could it wouldn't sound right at all.

~helplessness~

I couldn't move. It was a wonder I could even think to him. I couldn't see ... I could breathe, though. Concentrate on that, just breathe. Just.

*Are yer alright?*

/I think -- no./ I wasn't. In more ways than one. And I knew he knew I wasn't alright. Why had he even bothered to ask?

Jono didn't bother to even start asking the next question; he knew perfectly well what needed to be done. He intended to help me and --

-- what was this? Maybe Paige had every right to hate me.

Limp, unmoving, just breathing and thinking and feeling all these feelings swirling, I felt capable arms lift me from Paige's bed. And carry me. But wasn't I heavy?

*Yes, gel, you are.*

/I -- / couldn't think -- words -- I had every intention of staying alive. Awake, however was another --

During another break, I also got to know Ev better -- he was a history buff, and had a very intellectual mind; more so than I'd given him credit for. He loved good music, too -- jazz and some alternative. He was really a much deeper character than I'd thought before I got to know him. He was very kind and understanding, and I got the feeling that he was someone you could trust to be there - just the type of person you'd want to be your best friend. Somehow, being "in synch" with him, I could almost see into his mind. Not so much like a psychic link -- as Sean had explained to me, our subconscious and unconscious minds were linked, and as his power mixed with mine so did our minds. It was more like this tickling presence in the back of my mind, and the occasional gut feeling or instinct or impulse that was similar to mine but not mine floating in my mind. Almost like with Jennifer, because we had been friends so long we often knew what the other was feeling or thinking, but Ev was just one step closer -- he was actually there. I wondered if he felt the same thing, and got the feeling that he did when he nodded at me as soon as the thought formed.

As the 3 of us -- Sean, Ev, and I -- sat on a rock near the pond during one of our many breaks, I found it rather amusing to look over and see Ev's chest rise and fall perfectly -- well, in synch -- with mine, and even a lot of our unconscious movements mirrored each other. For instance, I would scratch my nose and his hand would twitch, wanting to rise to his own nose. Or we would both sneeze at the same time, or blurt out ideas at the same time. It was almost eerie.

After a while, our headaches had developed into migraines, and Sean apparently saw that neither of us was obviously up to training any more. Although I think the effects of the synch were beginning to wear off -- I could almost feel his presence draining from my mind, ever so slowly and gradually pulling out -- I could still sense him there, sharing my unharnessed power and randomest thoughts and, obviously, my pounding headache. Sean, though, finally told us to go down to the Med Lab and wait for him there, and we were both only too happy to comply.

As we passed the stairs, I saw Paige coming down them looking rather disturbed, and kind of like she wasn't quite all there. I wondered what the problem was, and, glancing into the mirror, I amusedly noticed that Ev had the same curious look on his face that I did. Go figure. Just as one of us (actually, I'm not entirely sure which -- it was more like a joint intention) was about to ask Paige about the reason of her distress, the doorbell rang; this caused both Ev and I to jump exactly 3 inches off the floor, and seemed to bring Paige -- somewhat -- out of her trance-like stupor.

"Ah'll ... get that," she mumbled; I noticed the unusually present Southern accent in her voice. Emma, with the ever-perfect timing she had that I was sure was not purely luck, entered the foyer as Paige opened the door to the cool, darkening Massachusetts evening. Before I could see anything beyond the doorframe, however, the headache suddenly flared up (so did Ev's obviously) and I felt a sudden strong compulsion to get to the Med Lab -- now. One glance told us that we were both sure that Emma had something to do with that twist of events, but we were nonetheless (telepathically) propelled towards the Med Lab, each of us arriving to collapse simultaneously onto one of 2 beds and landing in the same exact position. We let out a collective sigh and repressed a shared feeling of nausea as the ceiling lights suddenly became too bright for my particular liking at the moment.

"Is it always this bad when you use your powers?" Ev asked drowsily.

"Dunno," I replied with much the same lack of effort in my voice. "I haven't really used it all that much. Always gives me a headache, though." We both sighed tiredly again, and I had closed my eyes and begun to drift off when Jono came loudly through an adjacent door.

*Hey, you two! Where's either Frost or Cassidy?* he demanded. Along with his words came a sudden gush of concern, urgency, and worry that bombarded my being and caught me totally off-guard.

"I ... don't know." Ev answered, also caught off-guard. "Ms. Frost was in the foyer, but Sean should --"

"Should be here soon," I finished for him. Had that been intentional? "What's -"

"Up?" Ev finished. We cast wary glances at each other -- why was the synch suddenly so strong?

*Bloody hell...* Jono was cursing. *Where's a bloody teacher when you need 'em...?*

"What?!" we both asked.

*It's Jennifer.* he explained. *She --*

"Is she okay?!!" I was suddenly reeeally worried, and Ev looked almost pained at the amount of worry he must have suddenly felt gush throughout his being. My stomach began to churn -- I mean, if it could get Jono this worked up, it had to be bad. "Where is she? What happened?"

*She's in there.* He jerked a thumb back through the door he'd come through a moment before. Ev and I both slid off the beds simultaneously and headed for the door as I thought I caught Jono send a questioning look in our direction before continuing. *She ... I don't quite know what she did. She did something empathic to ... us ... and then she kind of just lost it with Paige. She's unconscious; I brought her down here.* We came through the door and I saw Jen lying on the bed, looking for all the world like she was just peacefully sleeping. Jono had hooked her up to an EKG, which was beeping happily in the corner of the room, doing its job and displaying what appeared to be a normal sinus rhythm.

"Her vitals are okay," Ev said, with the same concern I was feeling now.

*I can bloody see that!* Jono told us. *It's not her physical body that I'm so worried about at the moment.* As he was chewing us out for what we already knew, Sean picked that moment to come through the door and see us all there with Jono going ballistic -- well, ballistic for Jono, that was.

"Saints preserve us! What happened to her?" So Jono went on to explain what had happened. Sean listened as Ev and I sat in the corner, sharing concern and curiosity at what Jono said. I knew Jen could get a little weird, but this took the cake. Was she okay? I was worried, because even what Jono was describing sounded a little "out there" for Jennifer. I mean, I knew she was all ... gushing over him and stuff, but she wouldn't go this far just for him to notice her - I was sure of that. Something was definitely wrong.... I felt almost ashamed for liking Jono too, as he spoke almost shyly to Sean about what had happened and what he felt. In fact, it was making me uncomfortable, and that was making Ev uncomfortable. When he was finished, Jono just sat down in a chair next to the bed, looking quite tired all of a sudden. Was this link-thing to Jennifer affecting him more than he let on?

Sean sighed. "All right, let's just keep the situation under control. Since she appears to be all right physically, I say we should just let her get her rest and explore this development more fully when the lass wakes up."

"When --"

"Will that be?"

Sean looked over at the two of us as we finished the other's thought again.

Jono narrowed his eyes in our direction as well as we both squirmed. *Wot's with you two, anyway?* he sent.

"I don't know," Ev explained, my concern for Jen only fueling his exasperation. "We keep on --"

"Finishing each other's thoughts," I said sheepishly, caught in the very act we were trying to explain.

"But I thought the synch was beginning to wear off," Sean said, just a bit confused. He glanced at his watch. "It's been almost three and a half hours since ye first synched. Has it ever lasted this long, Everett?"

Despite the fact that the question had been directed at Everett, we both shook our heads, and I was the one that answered in the words Ev was about to put into sound. "It started to wear off, but right after we got here the synch started building up again." I had a disturbing feeling that it was only a matter of time before we both blew something up and ended up doing to the Med Lab something similar to what Jono had unintentionally done to the girls' dorm a while back. Sean nodded.

"Will ye come with me, lad?" he asked, and Ev got up to follow Sean into the other room, presumably to undergo some type of physical or diagnostic or something. "Wait here," he told me -- not that I had any intention of doing anything else. Not with Jen lying there. "I'll be back for you." He and Ev then left, leaving me alone with the unconscious Jennifer and the brooding Jono. I sighed -- not that I really had a problem with this, but even I was uncomfortable being left alone in here with the very object of Jen's angst with her right here as well, even if she was unconscious.

"You think she's gonna be okay?" I asked, not for any particular reason. It wasn't like Jono would know - he obviously didn't have too much of an idea of what was going on, either. But who knew? Maybe he did, and I just didn't know it. He shrugged.

*I don't know. I hope so. I don't really think the gel ... meant to do that. I think her power's just a little too much for her right now.*

I just nodded.

*I don't think she quite knows what she did. Actually, I don't think I know quite what she did.*

I remained silent -- what else was I supposed to do? It wasn't like I knew what she had done, and as I said, this was just the least bit uncomfortable. The uncomfortableness of the situation seemed to just hang in the air, and it was only augmented by the steady stream of ... something from Everett that I was getting through the synch. Now it was almost like white noise, or the radio static you get when, no matter what you do, your station won't quite come in and you settle for the best reception you can get. Suddenly "Monkey Wrench" by the Foo Fighters effectively lodged itself in my mind -- I was almost tempted to blame its presence on Everett, although I wasn't sure how or why it would be his fault.

"Don't wanna be your monkey wrench..." I sang softly, studying the ceiling tiles as we just sat there. It really wasn't like me to be uncomfortable like this -- usually I was the one who was all crazy and talkative. "Fall in, fall out..." I continued. Jono eyed me, and I guess I blushed or something close to it. "Sorry; it's in my head, and when stuff gets in there it tends to refuse to leave." He only shrugged - he had no obvious interest in me, and that made me all the angrier. It wasn't like I wanted him to just open up or anything, but... the whole situation was just way too Jenniferian for me. I had to do something to lighten the situation, or I had to get out of there. Come on, I reasoned with myself, you're sitting in Gen X's Med Lab with Jono, and you can't think of anything to say? Argh! You're hopeless! That beepy thing was really starting to get on my nerves, too.

"So... how exactly does Sean expect us to amuse ourselves? Especially with that EKG beeping annoyingly away in that corner. You know, those things have always bugged me."

*Have they?* he sounded almost amused, and I hoped that he might be willing to at least hold a conversation with me and not think I was a dork.

"Yeah ... like on ER and stuff. I dunno.. I'm just bored, I guess. And it's not helping, is all." The room fell silent again, and the boredom returned. I sighed; the headache was back, and so was my annoyance now that I was bored and felt like a certified, grade "A" dork. Jono seemed all concerned about Jen, which made me feel stupid -- it's not like I wasn't, because I was worried about her, but -- and I reiterate -- it was just uncomfortable being alone with him like this.

I brought my legs up to my chest, huddling up on the chair I was sitting on. This was all just too George confusing. I liked Jono, but I didn't know if I liked him like that. And if I did, I certainly wasn't going to tell anyone, least of all him. Besides, Jennifer obviously had his attention right now, and who was I to make him care about anyone else right now? I was just a friend, if even that much, and it was a status with which I was just going to be happy with. Not that I wanted more -- I'm not a mushy person like that. At least, not as far as I know. Not as far as I want to be. Oh, why did everyone have to be taken?! Why did I have to want someone in the first place? Oh, George. Jono remained silent, so I just sat there uncomfortably, drifting off without even noticing it.

The view was beautiful -- like a scene from Contact or those pictures of nebulae ... but here I was alone, truly alone, and that was -- that was perhaps my worst fear. I'd always enjoyed being by myself. Sometimes I needed it. But I knew there were always people around, and when I needed to be heard I could go to them. I had to get out of here, I had to get back to -- to everyone. Where was the door? How did one get out of here? I felt tight inside.

As if by some sick cue, a metal door with a green EXIT sign lit above its lintel simply appeared. That was bizarre ... I pushed the bar and stepped out --

-- and gasped for air, my eyes open and light filling my brain. The bright white light -- I adjusted my eyes and before long noticed the source: a flourescent lamp in the tiled ceiling. I was dizzy, the room spinning slowly, first one way and then the next. I swam, it seemed, in and out of this scene. I was most decidedly ill.

I faded between black and white like a junior high essayist fading between present and past tense -- make up my mind and pick one, couldn't I? I didn't want to go back to black because it was so lonely, even though the sweetness tempted me. And white was so bright and full of physical pain in my head and throat and all over.... On the threshold I wavered, unsure ... until I finally decided.

I was dreaming about Jimmy, Jack, and Freddo -- and Doc Holliday? -- when someone grabbed my ... foot? I woke up immediately, crashing down hard onto the even harder tiled floor.

"Ow!!!" Ev and I both yelled as he also fell -- apparently he had been floating too. Was I flying? I suddenly recalled that I could fly and that Ev was synched with me as my mind began to clear itself. "What happened?" I asked, standing back up.

"It was rather interesting, really," Sean said, smiling although he was still concerned about our fall. "Ye see, I was running some tests on Everett when he began floating off the bed. Jono came in to tell me that ye had fallen asleep and were floating as well, and ... well, it seems that when ye began to float it sent the command through the link Everett set up when ye synched and he couldn't help but do the same." That was weird, I decided -- that Ev's subconscious was responding to mine.

"This is weird," Ev decided, and it was hard not to laugh because, obviously, I was thinking the exact same thing. "No, really. This has never happened before."

"I still can't figure out why this is happening now...." Sean said thoughtfully, examining a readout that he had brought with him.

*Maybe it has something to do with the gel's powers; not just Synch's,* Jono suggested. Sean nodded.

"It's quite possible, lad. We do know that your power is based on telekinesis, and therefore linked somehow to basic telepathy," he addressed me. "Unfortunately, that's almost all we know about your power. There's something about it that makes it hard for the computer to determine exactly what it is ye do with yuir power. Perhaps it's a latent form of telepathy -- psionic powers that ye're not even aware of yuirself that are keepin' ye linked with Everett."

"Maybe," I agreed. It was as good a theory as any. Ev followed my train of thought, voicing the phrase that popped up in my mind.

"Yeah -- maybe our powers are getting tangled up with each other, and we can't --"

"Untie the knot," I finished the joint thought.

"An interesting theory. I'm going to go call Hank McCoy ... please stay here." Sean said, leaving again. At least this time I had Ev to back me up instead of being alone. Before I had really felt like I was imposing on something -- the whole "three's a crowd" type-thing. But now I had Ev for support. As if to further my support, Bobby Drake suddenly burst into the room.

"Hey guys!" he said. "I'm really sorry about this, but you're gonna have to stay down here for now."

"Hmm?" Ev and I asked at the same time. Bobby gave us a questioning look, but decided not to ask just yet. Instead, he went on to explain the reason we were being confined to the Med Lab.

"Well, these two government officials showed up. I think they're business associates of Emma's or something. Since you guys are not your ... typical students, Emma decided that until she's done you all have to stay down here. She wants to minimize all contact so she feels she has control over the situation. "

"As if she ever really has control," I muttered to Ev softly -- he smiled back, getting the meaning of what I thought -- that oftentimes Emma only thought she actually had control, and just managed to pull it off on the rest of us as well.

"And until then, I get to stay down here and supervise you guys." Bobby grinned widely, and I had to admit, that was an interesting idea. Bobby supervising anything, in fact, was an interesting idea, albeit a frightening one. But then again, he was Bobby, and therefore he was cool, in more than one sense of the word. "So ... what'cha guys -- hey, what happened to her?" He suddenly caught sight of Jen lying on the bed, still asleep.

*Don't know,* Jono said, a bit coldly (at least, as coldly as a psionic voice inside your head can sound).

"She kind of lost it and then --"

"Lost consciousness," Ev concluded for me. Bobby gave us another weird look.

"What's with you two?" he asked.

"His 'synch' went nuts," I told him.

"Oh." He seemed only mildly interested. "Anybody have a deck of cards?"

*A deck of cards? In here?* Jono asked warily.

Bobby put up his hands, as if he'd been offended. "I was just looking for a way to pass the time," he said in mock defense. Somewhere along the line, we did indeed discover a deck of cards, and so Bobby, Ev, and I sat down to play. I managed to convince them to play Egyptian Rat, which lasted about an hour. Jono went to sit with Jennifer in the other room, and I figured it was best just to let him be.

We later resorted to BS, which I think is an incredibly boring game. There's something about that just ... well, that just bores me. But Egyptian Rat was not working, since Ev and I kept on slapping the stupid cards at the exact same time. Half the time we couldn't tell who had gotten there first, simply because no one had gotten there first. After BS Bobby tried to run a poker game, but that was even more impossible than playing Egyptian Rat.

"You're bluffing," I told Everett matter-of-factly, and for the third time in the past five minutes.

He screwed up his face and threw down his cards. "Man, this is no fun! How am I supposed to pull off a bluff if you know I'm bluffing?!"

I smiled and shrugged, raking in the poker chips that were now mine. Well, they weren't exactly poker chips -- more like disks from the nearby medical computer, along with a few pens and latex gloves (I don't know how those had gotten promoted to the rank of 'poker chip,' but nonetheless they had) -- but they stood for some rather high values indeed. Bobby just smirked and, since his pile of chips was the biggest, I decided that just this once I would not slug him. Then I thought better of it and decided to slug him anyway. This was amusing, because he was suddenly being ambushed from both sides as Ev and I tackled him simultaneously.

"Hey, hey, no fair!" Bobby protested, blasting us both back with ice columns. "No teaming up."

We both just stuck out our tongues -- he returned the favor -- and sat there for a moment before resigning ourselves to be civil once more. So as they decided on something or other to do with the cards, I got up and began wandering around the small room, looking at stuff and picking things up, examining the room for lack of something better to do. After a while, Jono came out of the room and went right out of the Med Lab, obviously with some purpose. He looked; well, he looked like a man with a mission. The fact that he was leaving, however, was what interested us more.

"Hey, is he --"

"Supposed to do that?"

Bobby gave us a look but said nothing; then he shrugged. "Technically, I was sent down here to keep an eye on you three." He indicated myself, Everett, and the door behind which Jennifer was sleeping. "No one said anything about him, so he's really not my concern."

I rolled my eyes. "Always the -"

"Literal one, huh?" Everett and I both looked at each other as we finished yet another thought together.

"Is this annoying you two as much as it's annoying me?" Bobby asked, flipping cards up into the air randomly and watching them flutter back down to the ground. "Because it's reeeally starting to annoy me."

I smiled despite the situation - we were annoying the Iceman. In my book, that was a pretty impressive accomplishment, no matter which way you looked at it.

"Yes." Both Ev and I finally sighed in unison. "It is."

"And it's all his fault, too," I informed Bobby.

Ev looked at me like I'd just accused him of witchcraft or something. "My fault?! How is this my fault?"

"You're the one who synched with me in the first place!" I told him.

"It was your powers that made me do it! At least I know what my powers are!"

"Oh, getting trivial now, are we?" I asked.

Bobby just shook his head, flipping another card into the air.

"And what's with the Gambit impression?" I asked Bobby, now thoroughly ticked off for no reason I could really pinpoint. Maybe it was just Ev's and my exasperation building up to make me annoyed.

"What, de petite don't like Iceman's card tricks?" he asked in a really bad Cajun accent.

"No!" I said, but I had to smile at the bad accent nonetheless. "And even I can -- hey, what's with --"

"The tea?" Ev finished, as we watched Jono come down the stairs carefully balancing a silver tray with a teacup and steaming pitcher of water. I could see the tea bag hanging over the edge as the leaves seeped into the water in the process of making the awful stuff.

"I hate tea," Ev and I both observed. We looked at each other again, but were then once again taken with the sight of a guy with no mouth carrying a tea tray for no apparent reason. Jono said nothing, just continued through the room and pushed open the door to Jen's room, disappearing behind it once again. Ev and I looked at each other, then we both looked to Bobby. This time all three of us shrugged in unison.

"Hey, who's up for a game of 52 pickup?"

Cool air brushed my face despite the bright heat of the light and the pain behind my eyes. I was vaguely aware of the rest of my body. I had no idea what had happened, if anything had happened at all, and could not explain how I'd gotten here if I were paid.

The same aluminum and white I'd encountered earlier that day was enough to designate my surroundings as the medlab, though this time around the perspective was startlingly different. I stared up at the ceiling from my position on a bed -- or table -- or bed.

I was hot from the inside out, sore in that place where the ear, nose, and throat converge and it hurt to swallow and I was all too aware of the bloody headache throbbing in the back of my skull. I reached that small distance from one corner of my brain to the other to check for Jono -- yes, he was still there. And -- and worried.

About me. Where was he, anyway?

*Right 'ere,* he alerted me to his presence not far off.

/I know,/ I answered, smiling weakly. /Thank you./ I closed my eyes and it hurt to swallow.

~concern~ *Is there anything I can do?*

Tea would have been nice. With honey, for my throat. But I didn't want to make demands --

*Tea it is, then.*

Bloody -- my thoughts had betrayed me again! Was I ever going to get used to this? I didn't want tea, I wanted company ... I wanted him to stay here with me.... But he was already gone. How far was it, I wondered, to the kitchen? And how long since he'd even set foot in a room whose sole purpose was the storage and consumption of food?

~amusement~ carried over the link -- I still didn't want to think of it as such. (*Not nearly long enough.*)

I opened my eyes and closed them again, trying to find some way to quell this raging storm in my head. One set of emotions I was used to -- another I could possibly live with (although at this point I had no choice), but here it seemed I was reading everyone in the building simultaneously....

No, I realised. Not everyone all at once, but I had retained their conflicting feelings over the course of days. I couldn't rid myself of every smile, every tear, every bit of everyone I'd been in close proximity to over the past week and a half. And when one was in quarters with a half-dozen angst-ridden teenagers (myself included), there were a lot of emotions to build up. The link was no help to this. I still didn't know if I liked the idea of someone in my head constantly, but there was no undoing it.

Besides, there was a part of me that liked it very much. I kept my eyes closed -- the light didn't hurt quite so much, then -- and concentrated on my breathing. Each intake of air only further irritated my throat and it hurt! I allowed time to pass, simply laying there so peacefully with my eyes closed and so near to actual sleep.

I didn't know how much longer it was when Jono came back. I had to smile -- he looked so cute standing there with a tray in his hands, set with a ceramic teacup, kettle of hot water with a teabag string hanging out, a spoon and a bear-shaped plastic bottle of honey.

I was too aware of my own ~surprise~thanks~. /You really didn't have to do this ... /

Thoughts were quicker than spoken words, and he knew what I was going to say before I said it, so actual talking was unnecessary as well as painful. My head still throbbed; I could feel it in my ears, too, now.

*I wanted to.*

I was certain I was blushing. Positively certain. /Thank you,/ I answered, adding generous spoonfuls of honey to the tea. And smiling so much it hurt -- but in a good way.

It was so strange, it was like he'd undergone a bizarre transformation in the hours since -- that thing. I felt horrendously guilty, though. Would he have turned around anyway? I didn't know and I didn't think I cared at that point. I enjoyed simply being here with him.

Those last two words being the operative ones, of course. I did not enjoy being sick, and I did not enjoy medlab. And I did not enjoy this inherent confusion as to why I was here in the first place. There was a lot I didn't remember.

I drank my tea in small mouthfuls -- when the cup was dry I set it back on the tray. /I really appreciate this./

*You're welcome.*

I smiled again. He really wasn't the monster he made himself out to be; he could be so sweet sometimes. I wasn't sure, though, if I truly wanted to ask the question forming somewhere inside me. Would it be like the last invasion of privacy? I'd already knocked down the toughest walls -- did I need to knock even more down today?

Yes, I finally reasoned. Or they might never come down. I shifted position so I leaned closer to him.

*Wot are you doing?*

/Can I see ...?/ I began, reaching one hand out. I had no intention of unraveling his bandages myself --

Cool, hard fingers gripped my wrist along with a monosyllabic command. *No.*

I lowered my hand but he didn't let go.

*Yer -- you don't need to see that.*

I bit my lip and dropped my eyes to my lap. /Okay,/ I agreed. He did have a right to his privacy, after all.

It was so eerie, I noted -- sitting there in complete silence and yet -- still communicating. But that was the way of things, I guessed. The communication ceased, stopped dead. Neither of us had anything to say and it was growing slowly awkward. His hand slipped from my wrist and he pulled it back to himself.

Well, there went that.

*Wot?*

"Nothing." My voice was grainy and didn't sound quite right to me. I cleared my throat, hoping it would just jump back down there and stay there. /I'm still not used to this./

*Neither am I.*

I swallowed hard, closing my eyes and breathing.

*Wot did you do, anyway?*

I didn't want to deal with this right now. "I don't know," I said, turning over in the bed and pulling the thin, scratchy sheet around me. Light -- that wasn't the way to go. I couldn't avoid him.

That crazy, weird, uncharacteristic ~helplessness~ came barrelling at me again, coupled with ~exasperation~. If he could sigh I'm sure he would have.

I sat back up, shaking my head. "No. I'm sorry," I whispered. That was all my voice would allow at that point. I looked down at the starched white blanket. I wasn't sure that I wanted to look at him or anything else in the room but myself because I knew I was there. I was all I could trust.

I detected the presences coming like one might notice a plane overhead: with the vague awareness that it was there, but feeling no need to actually do anything about it.

Alison stuck her head in. "Is she okay now?"

"Can we come in?" I heard another voice add. It sounded like Everett.

"I'm fine," I announced, smiling but my throat still incredibly scratchy. I felt like I'd swallowed a cupful of gravel. "Come on in."

Alison opened the door the rest of the way, followed by an extremely ~confused~ Everett and a maniacally grinning Bobby Drake. Light, no! Not Bobby! "Hi," Alison greeted almost apprehensively.

I nodded a response, my throat hurting too much to really talk. I was getting incredibly tired. Alison, Bobby, and Everett were all chiming in to tell the tale of how and why they were all locked in the medlab until further notice.

"I've been enlisted to keep an eye on all of you," Bobby explained. "Some government types came to visit." Bobby could never in a thousand years 'keep an eye on' all of us when I was certain he was the one who needed a babysitter. But government types? Was the school in trouble? I hoped not. I did, however, detect an amount of ~embarrassment~ at the mention of the "government types", though he did not flush.

Alison continued. "And Emma wants us to stay down here 'till she -- "

"-- thinks she's in 'control' of the situation," Everett finished.

That was odd; it was like they were both riding the same train of thought.

"And you know Emma," Alison added.

Bobby snorted.

"She always thinks she's in 'control," Everett explained.

He was certainly uncharacteristically bouncy. What was up with them? And why the heck were they finishing each other's sentences like Tweedledum and Tweedledee?

*She wants to know what's up with you two,* Jono informed them, all amused all of a sudden for no apparent reason. *And why the heck you're finishing each other's sentences.*

He knew why! And he wouldn't tell me!

And he wasn't supposed to be my personal relay service just because I had a sore throat, but it was certainly nice of him.

"We, uh ... " Alison said.

"That is, she ... "

"I did? You're the one that synched with me!"

"It was your powers that got us into this mess," Everett accused gently.

"I don't even know what they are!" Alison protested.

"Uh-huh," Everett said, folding his arms at the exact same moment Alison folded hers. Both instantly realized what they were doing and unfolded them, equal ~exasperation~ coming from both.

I chuckled softly at that, smiling to myself.

"We oversynched," Alison and Everett said at the exact same time.

It wasn't planned, I noted -- they each thought their thoughts were their own individual thoughts, even those borrowed from the other. It was cute. Their faint auras, which weren't actually so faint, but instead manifested that way to my eye because of my lingering illness -- their faint auras registered as varying shades of green and blue, mixing and mingling with one another to the point at which I couldn't discern where one began and the other ended. Bobby's now-quiet orange was bordering on golden yellow as he stood in the corner, truthfully believing he exerted some control over the situation. He was as bad as Emma, to tell the truth. Those two were closer in temperament than either of them cared to admit. The deep indigo that usually surrounded Jono was now as invisible to my eye as my own aura. I hadn't expected that.

" ... and things were getting so boring we actually resorted to fifty-two pickup," Alison finished the sentence she herself had started.

Bobby coughed. He was being unusually quiet. Perhaps it was this charge he had been given that gave him at least some sort of maturity level. Or perhaps he simply wanted to impress Emma with his vast knowledge of how to keep teenagers in line. He wasn't too far off from one, himself, so that gave him the best sort of expertise in the area.

"But you're okay now?" Everett asked.

It had been Alison's thought -- hadn't it? -- and as a result, her usually slow temper flared if ever so slightly. They were quite obviously sick of this by now. How long had this been going on?

(*A few hours,*) Jono informed me.

I still wasn't used to this. Eventually, though. Eventually.

"Yeah," I told them. "I'm okay now."

Alison radiated a sentiment of ~satisfaction~ which mixed oddly with the strange -- what was that? She was jealous, though guiltily so, ashamed of the emotion she didn't even know she projected onto me. I curbed my own confusion so it wouldn't overflow onto the others. I would have to ask her about that later.

Wait. No, I wouldn't have to ask her about it. I already knew the source of her conflicting and completely un-Alisonian emotions, and he was standing beside me in his black leather jacket. I couldn't help but feel guilty at this realization, but stuck it in a back pocket of my mind along with my earlier confusion. Jono didn't ask the question I knew he was formulating, yet I still dismissed it with a quiet /Later./

Alison and Everett yawned simultaneously. Catching it, I yawned myself, and it sent a sharp ache down my already sore throat. Bobby found this all wildly amusing and began to laugh so hard he had to leave the room. That was the part of him surfacing that Emma would soon kill and serve in neat little portions for dinner. I chuckled as best I could at that thought, more mentally than actually chuckling on account of the pain I felt.

Interestingly enough, Emma was the one to appear in the doorway to the small section of medlab that the four of us occupied. At her arrival, Jono mentally tensed and I found myself holding my breath and tightening my own hands, curling nervous fingers around equally nervous thumbs. With all my will I wished her away, but being Emma, as she was, she did not leave. Alison was beginning to doze in the corner, simply slipping out of consciousness as easily as Emma had slipped into the room.

She didn't greet us, simply vaulted into, "How did this happen? Why wasn't I informed?"

"I don't know," I explained scratchily as she leaned over me to check my vital signs on the machine overhead.

"Hmm," Emma mused quietly, and returned to her initial question. "How did this happen?" she repeated.

"I don't know," I admitted again. I suspected the initiation of the link combined with the intense emotional output Paige had given off during that ... discussion ... to send me into something near hysteria, but I had absolutely no foundation to support that theory so I left it alone.

(*There's a thought, though, gel.*)

Light. I most certainly was not used to this. "I ... " I began, quite fearful to explain my take on the situation, rickety as it was. I took a deep breath and it pained me, but I continued anyway. "I think it had something to do with ... um, emotional backup. Like, it completely ... "

"I see," Emma said, voice silken in sharp contrast to my own. A brief moment of indecision flickered in her pale pink aura before she finally bit the proverbial bullet and asked, "Do you mind if I ... ?"

She hadn't been reading me this whole time? I was surprised. And the fact that she'd actually asked came as even more of a shock. I was tempted to let her in just for that display of actual morals, but I had to deny her that opportunity. I still didn't like the idea of her in my head and didn't think I'd ever would. "Yes," I said. "I mind." I didn't need her poking in there, searching for a way to rid my mind of this emotional crud littering it and accidentally finding Jono. "But thank you for asking," I added. She was certainly learning something.

Emma gave no "you're welcome", and I wasn't expecting one, either. Instead she tried again. "I would like to reverse this," she explained. I could tell this was hard for her: Emma Frost did not need anyone's permission to do anything. "The psionic buildup that has taken place can be cleared without any after-effects."

Like cleaning out a cache of files deposited in one's hard drive. I already said no, but she wouldn't give up, would she?

*Would yer leave the gel alone?* Jono interrupted.

Emma's eyebrow raised coolly in response to the unexpected challenge. I knew this was it. This was so completely it, and I was going to get in so much trouble for doing something I hadn't intended to do or even known how to do, and something I couldn't undo besides. I refrained from pulling the flimsy cover above my head and hiding right then and there. Thankfully, though, she said nothing more on the subject and instead changed it to, "As you may or may not know, we have had unexpected guests arrive to speak with me about ... business matters. Because their arrival was unwarranted -- as well as unannounced -- it has been decided that the student body be kept under close supervision, and remain in one general area." She paused and swallowed. "Medlab was not our first choice, however, because of your current condition, all other options have been eliminated. Expect those who are not already here to arrive shortly. Mr." -- she coughed -- "Drake will be supervising. Obey him as implicitly as you would me."

I held back a snort -- because it would have hurt, and I wanted to give Emma every impression of my supposed obedience and loyalty to her majesty the White Queen. It went against my former strategy of dealing with her, but I figured perhaps this way she'd get off my back and stay out of my head. I said nothing.

Emma spun on her heel and left the room to return to whatever duties awaited her upstairs.

*I'm sorry yer 'ad to deal with that,* Jono apologized.

/It's not your fault. Don't worry./

He gave no response save to take my hand again. I smiled up at him, squeezing his fingers tightly, feeling them throb gently with an energy that emulated a regular pulse.

My attention was broken, however, when Bobby -- oh, excuse me, Mr. Drake -- opened the door gently and asked, "Is she gone yet?" when he knew perfectly well that Emma was wherever she needed to be and thankfully not here bothering us where she didn't belong.

I nodded.

Bobby let out a long sigh and sat on a particularly uncomfortable-looking chair someone had placed in the corner. "Thank God," he praised the ceiling softly.

Well, I doubted that was the ceiling's name and occupation.

With the new arrival, Jono reduced his grip on my hand as though he were about to let go. I wouldn't let him, and only held on tighter. Anything either of us were about to say, though, was gently interrupted by Everett's call of, "Guys ..."

A quick glance in his direction showed he was hovering only inches off the floor, limbs only slightly akimbo. Floating? I wondered. But Monet wasn't ... Then it dawned on me. It was Alison, who he was still synched with. Oversynched with, even.

And Alison had managed to doze off over in the corner, seemingly unnoticed. She, too, was hanging precipitously in the air.

"This happened before," Everett explained, sleep forming in his voice as well.

I imagined it had. And I still found this whole idea rather cute.

"Someone wake her up," Everett pleaded gently.

Of course. It was "cute" when it happened to someone else, but it was another story entirely when it happened to me. It was sort of similar, I realized. Sort of. But not really. I wondered if Alison felt the same intense -- nah. She just wasn't like that.

Bobby rose to the task -- quite literally, standing up from the chair, unwilling to show his own fatigue. With a particularly devious grin, he transmogrified into a veritable icicle and prepared to awake my dormant friend. She was going to love this.