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THE LOVER AFTER ME written by Multi-Facets
Here I go again,
I promised myself I wouldn't think of you today.
It's been seven months and counting; You've moved on.
I still feel exactly the same.
It's just that everywhere I go, the buildings all know your name,
Steel and granite reminders.
The city calls your name and I can't move on.
Ever since you've been gone,
The lights go out the same,
The only difference is you call another name
To your love, to your lover now,
To your love….
The lover after me.
He spent most of his time trying to keep his soul numb, to keep his heart partitioned from the rest of his life. It was the only way he could keep from thinking of her. He remained in a well of depression, and it affected everything he did, from writing songs to composing music to exercising his power. It just didn't matter anymore. Nothing mattered without her.
Am I all alone in the universe? There's no love on these streets. I have given mine away to a world that didn't want it anyway.
True, he'd voluntarily let her go long before that day, but he'd just wanted her to be happy. And if she was happy with someone else, well….
So this is my new freedom? It's funny, I don't remember being chained. But nothing seems to make sense any more. Without you I'm always twenty minutes late.
Ever since you've been gone, the lights go out the same, The only difference is you call another name To your love, to your lover now, To your love…. The lover after me.
And time goes by so slowly, I shouldn't be holding on, But I'm still holding on for you.
….God, it hurt so much to think of her in his arms at night, him waking up to her in the morning, feeling her love wash over him like a warm, tangible wave. He would wake up in the middle of the night, mentally reach for her, just to reassure himself she was there…. and touch a distant mind closed to him, and feel a tsunami of grief. Slowly, so slowly, he closed her from his heart.
Here I go again, I promised myself I wouldn't think of you today. But I'm standing at your doorway, I'm calling out your name because I can't move on.
Ever since you've been gone the lights go out the same, The only difference is you call another name, To your love To your lover now, To your love, The lover after me….
The doorbell rang and Jonothon sadly dragged his thoughts from the past as he went to answer the door. His jaw dropped when he saw who his visitor was. "Paige," he whispered. "Wha…. What're you doing here?"
Paige lowered her eyes to the suitcase she held in her hands. "Well, I…. That is, I mean…." she stammered. "This is hard to say, but…. I made a horrible mistake. I thought I would be happy with Tristan, but I'm not. I'm too far from the X-Men, too far from home…. and too far from you. If you can forgive me for my stupidity, I'd like to try again."
Jono stood there stupidly for a moment, a shocked look on his face. Then, slowly, a grin spread across his face as happy tears flowed down his cheeks. "Sunshine, of course I forgive you," he managed to say. "I want to try again too."
With a smile and a heart lighter than it had been for months, Jonothon Starsmore welcomed Paige Guthrie into his home, and once again into his heart.
"The Lover After Me", copyright Savage Garden, 1999.
